tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3834488480632846997.post4770715234813451117..comments2010-08-31T01:08:50.376-04:00Comments on Searching for Sidewalks: Family Heirlooms and Unfortunate InheritancesJamiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08134070009124332958noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3834488480632846997.post-11835061097813740022010-04-25T16:24:03.205-04:002010-04-25T16:24:03.205-04:00My unfortunate heirloom is emotion. I mean INTENSE...My unfortunate heirloom is emotion. I mean INTENSE emotion, I cry...a lot. I feel everything intensely and react the same way. I see it in my son. I think it's because we are both of the cancer sign. The hard part is that I believe there is some value in it, but it always strikes at the worst times. In stressful situations in particular. I cry. My son is the same. Like you, we are trying to equip him with coping mechanisms, and I'm really hoping that over the long term they will work. I think if you stick with it, they will. <br /><br />One thing...I never though I had a temper until I had kids. For some reason they just bring it out in us. You would hope it would be the opposite, but it's not. I have come close to lose my mind on more than one occasion. Try not to beat yourself up about it, they can easily drive us to distraction.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3834488480632846997.post-30694144895130812292010-04-25T10:48:56.905-04:002010-04-25T10:48:56.905-04:00I really relate to this. I remember the first tim...I really relate to this. I remember the first time I saw E's temper and the guilt and sadness that came with it. I couldn't BELIEVE how easily he picked that up from me. Now the best gift I can give him is to teach him how to manage his temper since I think that he's got one to matter what. <br />But those first few glimpses -- i just felt like an unfit mother. I had to come to terms with doing the best I can and learning to do better. The mirror that our children are to our own shortcomings can make me cry. <br />I think that there is a big gift in our children seeing us try and fail and try again though. Because that's so much of life. I think that you and your E will be okay. Because you want to grow. And that is a GREAT example.Alex@LateEnoughhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14863414847952789404noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3834488480632846997.post-46012643626331572052010-04-24T23:44:03.034-04:002010-04-24T23:44:03.034-04:00My mom and I are both hardcore conflict-avoiders. ...My mom and I are both hardcore conflict-avoiders. We will take it and take it and take it so long as we don't have to confront anyone about it. I very much hope I can teach my kiddos to stand up for themselves. I know I should start by setting a good example but ... <br /><br />And I understand the temper and anger. Some days are just so darn hard. Hang in there!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3834488480632846997.post-14666389400943628382010-04-22T19:38:26.618-04:002010-04-22T19:38:26.618-04:00I always wonder how much is nature and how much is...I always wonder how much is nature and how much is nurture. I think I inherited a propensity toward anxiety from my mom, or did I get it from watching her and feeling her emotions? Not sure. I did inherit a pout, that's for sure. My father was not really in my life, so I always wonder what I got from which parent. It's hard to know. Don't be so hard on yourself. You're doing the best you can and at least you know you have a temper, so you'll be careful with it. (Though that's a lot easier said than done.) I haven't taken out much of my anger with kids, just my husband. It's a bit better that way, but not by much. Plus, your kid is young, right? They do it to us!Janahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03234310366855556236noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3834488480632846997.post-86505979784435477522010-04-22T11:04:28.067-04:002010-04-22T11:04:28.067-04:00My temper from my dad. My stubbornness from my mom...My temper from my dad. My stubbornness from my mom. My procrastination from my dad. My need to win an argument from my dad. My fear of imposing on others from my mom. My constant worrying from my mom.<br /><br />If it weren't for my parents and these traits / flaws I've inherited from them, I would've been perfect. Hah!Justinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16968048136720936198noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3834488480632846997.post-37717248679324580262010-04-21T23:14:29.951-04:002010-04-21T23:14:29.951-04:00I inherited a propensity for clutter, unfinished p...I inherited a propensity for clutter, unfinished projects, a fairly advanced case of vain self-consciousness, and quick assumptions. And many saggy parts. <br />So far, my son has shown no sign of any of these. He takes after his father: loves straightening up, fixing things, finishing things and moving on. (In the temper department, my mother did suspect for months that he had inherited my sister's volatility - but I think it was a fluke.)<br />Thankfully, I inherited my father's strong belief in self-control, and I've been improving. I clean off my desk once a week; I do laundry daily; I bring home less and and I weed out the house every three months.Lesliehttp://fivetonine.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3834488480632846997.post-10754506225521349212010-04-21T22:16:16.216-04:002010-04-21T22:16:16.216-04:00Procrastination. It's a trait I inherited fro...Procrastination. It's a trait I inherited from my dad. It's too early to know whether my daughter has it, but I hope not.stayathomemdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11220913437370851264noreply@blogger.com